Masks
Most of us try to put our best face forward, but that face may not be our real selves.
I wear a mask.
It is a mask that I have put together to protect myself.
I suffer from too much empathy.
Too much empathy is a type of handicap in this world.
People's emotions can flood into me.
The first mask I use to deflect emotions that can flood over me is to hum to myself.
If the number of angry people around me increases, I'll sing a random song softly to myself.
At other times, I put on the mask of humor.
My best shield, my preferred boundary.
I have used that mask ever since I can remember.
It's my oldest and favorite.
That mask was developed to survive physical violence.
When you're raised in a home where violence, mainly random bi-polar violence, occurs, it turns out to be a good thing to keep your empathy at a frosty level of awareness.
Dad could switch on violent anger at the drop of a hat.
He could be laughing and joking at one moment, but one unpredictable remark or action from you could send him into an angry fit.
It could sometimes be defused with a well-placed piece of observational humor.
Sometimes, it could not, and the bloody beatings would follow.
I still do not do well around anger.
I don't run away.
I don't hide.
I've learned to face it.
Look into its empty eyes for a while.
The darkness of man…
However uneasy it makes me.
Just like a monster in a nightmare, I have found that if you stare into the face of anger, you will see its source.
Tonight, around the world, in our nation, in our homes, we are facing a nightmare.
The source material of this nightmare has been crafted from our own shared experience.
There are issues that we, as a people, have not addressed because we are fearful.
Fear is a force.
Fear, if not confronted, will grow into a monster called anger.
The beast called anger stalks the streets of the American consciousness.
Anger leads to hate…
The fear in the world and our nation is a genuine concern.
Many want to hide from the truth.
It is more fearful to look into the source of the anger than it is to project that anger at the innocent.
I'm sure my father had a problem that made him angry.
But like most humans, instead of addressing the problem head-on, it was easier to beat his kids to a bloody pulp.
They offered no resistance.
So you're saying most problems don't offer significant resistance?
No, the complete opposite.
That's why problems are a problem because they resist ordinary human effort.
Most problems require the extra mile, extra effort, and more willpower than the average person is willing to expend to resolve.
The biggest problem we have in this Republic is "Race."
A nation founded on freedom yet kept slaves.
That is, by definition, hypocrisy.
A Constitution that says all men are free, yet these over here are not.
The human duality of mind…
To be human, by definition, means you can keep two thoughts in your head that are in exact opposition to each other.
Military intelligence.
Crash landing.
Jumbo shrimp.
Free Lunch
Masks…
The war between the States never ended.
The battle to free men's hearts continues today.
Many wear the mask of civility, but in their hearts, they don't believe that all men are equal.
Behind these masks, a dark ocean of anger has swelled.
The finger of blame is pointed at the innocent.
Scapegoats.
When the real source is never examined.
Where does this anger come from?
How do you tell a person they believe in a false God?
How do you tell a person they swallow a false story about themselves?
How do you help a person understand that their problem is not outside of themselves?
It's inside.
It's them.
They are the creators of their doom.
Like an addict, they blame everyone but themselves for why they are at death's door.
The racist needs someone else to blame because to face the nightmare that they are to blame for their life is too much to bear.
Generation after generation scapegoat and blame their object of resentment, never once looking into their own hearts, minds, and actions, that they are the source of their unhappiness.
Masks…
Masks are only effective in the short term.
No mask will save you from the beating.
The only way to save yourself is with the truth.
Be kind to yourself.
You are deserving of love.
Open your heart and your eyes, and awaken from your nightmare.
See that you are surrounded by a golden light.
That darkness that you are afraid of?
You only had your eyes shut.
Peace.
Daniel J Frey aka Toby